SlugisDoug episode 27: The Question

SiDe27: The Question

This one is heavy. It’s a downer. I apologize. It will not make your day happier for one hour. But it is important. It is important that I work this out. It is important that you listen. Or not.

There is some music.

  • Drift 1- Brian Eno
  • Always Returning – Brian Eno
  • Wherever You Are – Ulrich Schnauss

Also, there is a clip from Keith McNally’s podcast XO-009-Photopia. You should listen to this and all of the other XO episodes.

Stream SlugisDoug episode 27

Direct Link to mp3

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5 comments on “SlugisDoug episode 27: The Question

  1. Wow. This was the first episode of your podcast I’ve listened to. I didn’t cry, but some of that hit home pretty fiercely. I completely agree that once one has a child, one sees every interaction and relationship through a different lens. I find it much more common that I will cry in a film because I will be projecting the loss of the child on screen over my own life. The brain is a powerful thing. … anyway… Thank you for sharing such deep, personal, emotional stuff. You’ve gained a listener.

  2. Thanks Cheryl. I’m glad you took time to listen and to comment.
    I agree with your comment that once one has a child, every interaction and relationship is seen through a different lens. I suppose that this is true for many other events in one’s life: first day of school; first kiss; first love; first time having sex; first broken bone; marriage etc. I turn 40 next week so I can imagine things are going to change even more then.
    Glad you are listening. Hope I don’t disappoint in future!
    Cheers!

    Also, see you in the Dyscultured chat room!

  3. Amen to your comments on the STRENGTH of love that you have for your own child. It hit me shortly after my first child was born – I couldn’t believe the strength of feelings I had for that baby, and I’d never really taken much interest in BABIES…

    ; )

    I don’t know how I would cope without my kids. For me getting home from work is a 5-minute drive or a 15-minute bike-ride, so even when there’s a crazy deadline at work (which has not been all that often), I still get to see my kids when I go home for supper. I’ll often then hang around until my toddler is off to bed before heading back to work again. It’s great to have that option. And if I miss my wife and toddler, I can usually tell the girls that I need to run an errand and just drop in for a minute. ; )

    I hope you can figure out something better just to make small improvements in your ability to spend time with your daughter. I was dyin’ inside hearing you so anxious to see her after a long day.

    But for me listening here, it wasn’t a downer. I identify with your feelings from afar and it feels really good to know someone else goes through some of the same stuff. Once again I applaud you for having the courage to put yourself out there like that, Doug.

    – Hank

  4. Great, here I am finally showing up to leave a comment on this episode and there’s already another episode posted? Way to make me look like a jerk, jerk.

    Anyway, this episode makes me think of the many nights I couldn’t sleep as a child because I was thinking about death and talking through it with Mom. I see those conversations through the different lens referred to above.

    I think the most important point to be taken from the discussion is that our time together is short and does not end at our choosing; enjoy it while you can.

  5. You can see from the comments above that you are not alone in your thoughts and feelings. I too can say “been there and felt that way too”.
    Fortunately you have 15 more years of life experience and wisdom to give you perspective and help you deal with it – and you are doing this rather well I must say – and a beautiful daughter to soothe the worries away at the end of the day!
    The only other comment I would make is that when I had to spend extra hours at work, I decided it was better to come home for dinner with the family and then go back to work in the evening (like Hank has mentioned above). That was always an important break from the problems at work and fortunately I was in a position where I could do that. I have to say it was nice living only 8 minutes away from my job!

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